October 27 - 28, 2007 (Saturday-Sunday)
''Weekend in Review''

Nearly two weeks of responses to my ''Pussy Licking'' personal ads and I've gone from ''hopeful'' to ''hateful.'' And it doesn't always come down to the ''picture submission'' issue, since I've even had a few who had contacted me before through other ads and they still pull their inconsiderate and game-playing bullshit! (I have to put up multiple ads extending the same exact offer because there is no one type of ad that manages to garner any responses, so I've been flooding the page with slight variations of the same basic information, with the exception of putting up one exclusionary ad requesting meetings with ''white girls.'')

Tiring of dealing with all the insincerity and discourteousness coming from these contacts (not just the rejection part as soon as I submit my picture to them but especially their rudeness in instantaneously breaking off further contact without having the decency to send a final response to let somebody know that they've lost interest for whatever reason so they wouldn't be left hanging), I placed another semi-gripe ad (with some obvious sexual undertones) into the regular ''men seeking women'' category to see what would happen there. Remarkably, I had received a reply with a phone number (which I was initially very hesitant to call) after I had returned from work Saturday night. When I worked up the nerve to call, after repeatedly trying to convince myself that the response to the ad and the number were legitimate, I spoke to a very sweet but not very talkative voice on the other end. She was saying that she found the ad intriguing (strange how it's always my bitch & moan "diss Hawaii's women" ads that get these responses) and after talking with me for some time (more like after I did all the talking) she invited me to come over just to hang out as company & watch a movie or whatever. I was very hesitant at the speed of this invitation, especially since it was clearly understood that it was not to be a date for sex, but I had already been putting up an ad in ''Casual Encounters'' declaring that I would be willing to stop by a woman's place right after work for a pussy licking session, so I decided to make this trip down Kapiolani Bvd. where she resided. I brought along a DVD, knowing pretty much already that we wouldn't be watching it.

I was pleasantly surprised when I met her... she was a girl of some size, but she was quite cute and young. She was a bit more conversational in person than over the telephone, so I managed to be a bit more quiet. We didn't do much except watch a couple of television programs she was flipping through and occasionally talking about this or that for a couple of hours (around 2:00 into Sunday morning), which actually seemed like a much shorter time. I have no idea if I'll ever hear from her again, but I'd look forward to, and appreciate, a call-back.

At work later that evening I accessed several of their unlocked Internet-connected computer systems (without authorization, of course, and came extremely close to getting my ass busted at it big time Saturday afternoon) to make some minor tweaks to my ''boyfriend'' ad (...actually, what it's called is, ''Boyfriend of Convenience'') so I could expand its message to include things beyond just getting together for sexual encounters, then I placed a new  ''exclusionary''  ''pussy licking'' ad in the ''seeking sex'' category restricting responses to ''mature'' women, wanting to see where, if anyplace, such an ad would take me. In the latter case I did pull in a single response so far, but I'll probably never hear back from this person because this is where I'd finally decided to turn utterly nasty regarding these lame assed attempts to squeeze a photograph out of me up front, even though in EVERY SINGLE AD I've posted emphatically states that I will not submit a picture until I had been sent one first. These pretend-to-be ignorant bitches still try to pull the switch-a-roo by asking for my pic before they send me theirs, and in a few instances on my own I've submitted photos without having even been asked. But beginning with this latest response I've decided that I am no longer in the mood to play this childish-assed game, so I've drafted & saved a ''form letter'' response paragraph to insert into any reply to any email responses I receive which try to get me to fall for that trap. In fact, I'll just reproduce my response right here... and if they can't ''get'' that, then piss on them -- I've f*cking had it playing ''nice.''

I must refuse your request for a picture, however, since I stated very clearly in the ad that one does not get sent out until one gets sent "in" first (without any "cover-ups", and not just genitalia/cleavage shots). I'm sorry, but I have to be a prick about this due to past lessons learned, so this prerequisite for receiving photos of me is both inflexible and without exception. I will be more than happy to comply with a pic submission request once my originally requested obligation has been met. If this policy bothers you, then I'm sorry we could not advance beyond this stage of the conversation, and we'll both agree to part as friends... unless you're willing to just chance it and agree to meet "blind".

I also had to deal with calls this weekend from my credit card issuer's fraud alert department informing me that now my  ''MasterCard''  has been compromised and is being used by someone in New York State. They said they managed to reject all of the attempted charges, but it still results in the cancelling of my account. And here I am still sitting on my two replacement  ''Visa''  cards which I've still not activated since having received them.

November 3, 2007 (Saturday)
23:55, Hawaii Standard Time.

Events took place which made me late for work this morning which all ties in directly with events that took place throughout the past several days of this week.

It began with an email exchange I had begun with a woman who had responded to one of a couple of my final attempt "LTR" dating ads posted at  ''Craig's List.''  She had contacted me on Monday (Oct. 29) and wondered if my ''pouring out'' ad was legit. I assured her it was (complaining about how Mainland transplants are made to feel unwelcome in the ''local'' dating scene, especially ''untall'' skinny men), even though in honest truth the ad was also meant to serve an attempted ''dual'' purpose of enticing any respondents to want to open their legs for pussy lickings. She, claimed to be experiencing the same dilemma as I, with regard to feeling rejected and isolated, and understood how I could rationalize my leaving ''LTR'' territory because of it in search of sexual encounters just in order to have ''some'' physical contact with someone. She had later, in a follow-up email (as had several other women who responded to the same ad), suggested that there was another side to ''dating rejection'' in these islands, namely that there seemed to be a stigma against large-sized Caucasian females, especially from the mainland. (Note: I had ''missed''-- meaning 'read' but did not 'catch' --when she described herself as ''round''... an apt description, as I was to find out later.)

Our successive email communiques wavered all over the place, from passionate reflection to highly charged sexual innuendo, until on ''Halloween'' night I suggested we get together and watch a DVD movie together, because she said earlier that day that her friends had broken off their plans with her for the night and she was going to be home alone (she had left me her phone and we talked for a while right after she was finished at her job, but she was still in the area, stuck in traffic). She said she had a project to work on at home for her employer, so the movie date was out, but we agreed to meet at the ''Ward Ave.'' ''Jamba Juice'' location.

I was disappointed because she was much, much larger than I had expected or envisioned, but I was gentlemanly nonetheless, and she admittedly was sort of ''cutish'' facially. We hung out in the outdoor table area for over four hours just talking about everything under the sun. When we about to part for the night our ''good-bye'' hug turned into an extended hug-fest, and ended with a couple of kisses on the mouth, where she slipped her tongue inside mine and, remarkably for the first time in my life I did not recoil from it.

About an hour later back at home, about an hour before midnight & date change into Nov. 1, we were both in  ''gmail''  and she contacted me via ''chat'' feature, making it the first time either of us had used the feature. Her discussion quickly turned sexual, and I followed along, more if it were an everyday conversation but, of course, wanting to see where it would be heading. She made it known that she was masturbating with a device while we were chatting. But there was no invitation, but she held the possibility open for a later date. But later that night she informed me in chat that there would not be any ''date'' of any sort with us, because she had just learned that her ''boyfriend'' was returning from work in Alaska and wanted to get serious about their relationship. I said I understood, and was actually somewhat relieved.

The next night (Nov 2, Friday), however, she was back with the heavily charged sex talk, saying that she would like to get with me just one time, to which I of course agreed, but the ''meeting place'' was going to be the problem, what with my apartment complex's ''house rules'' regarding late-night visitors and her two male roommates on either side of her room. I suggested an idea I had always held in mind for just such an occasion -- take advantage of my knowledge of my place of work and utilize one of the ''rooms'' I'm probably not supposed to know anything about, let alone have access to them, and we could do our stuff there on site and most likely never be detected. So she came by, got me, and we drove out to the location and did our thing.

This is what brings us back up to today... we had managed to stay engaged in our bedroom activities for over five hours, so that by the time she decided we were done I was already a couple of minutes past check-in time for my work duties, and I still had to be brought back to the apartment, get dressed & get my gear together and head back out there. I got to work 2 hours late... extremely tired.

November 22, 2007 (Thursday)
23:55, Hawaii Standard Time.

I was invited by my former KCC co-worker, Mike, to have T-Day dinner at his new house further back into Kalihi Valley with his wife & keiki along with his wife's brother Chad, her sister Sharice (sp.?) and her brother-in-law Stacy. Along with the so-called ''traditional'' stuff Mike cooked up what he called ''gumbo'' (a watery soup without all the important ingredients, especially the okra), but despite not being true gumbo it did not taste half bad. I basically sat around eating, drinking beers (my first  ''Heineken,''  which I halfway liked, being how I am not a fan of beer at all), talked story and more or less watched the activities of others, mostly playing video games. (I was there from about 15:30 'til about 22:30.) Mike also had a few burned ''conspiracy theory'' DVDs relating to the ''Freemason/Illuminati'' connections and all that (more of the same ol' same ol' of how all the various ''secret societies'' are somehow a vast global entity that's tightly interwoven and with the goal of world & economic domination and all that undoubtedly PARTIALLY true jazz), but he had also been given Alex Jones' production,  ''MARTIAL LAW 9/11,''  which I did encourage him to take a look at, along with my very first DVD+R burn of Adam Curtis' ''BBC 2'' documentary,  ''THE POWER OF NIGHTMARES: The Rise of the Politics of Fear,''  which I had brought over for him to watch along with them, even though, quite honestly, I don't ever expect him to watch any of them.

November 23 - 25, 2007 (Friday-Sunday)
''Weekend in Review''

"Apparently having gone completely off my nut, I agreed Friday morning to work off-island once again, this time with a month-long extension, ''at least,'' they said. Not only does the length of time away from the apartment bother me (especially given the time frame with lease renewal complications and all), and not only does the idea of ''sharing" a (h/m)otel room with another person (especially another male) not set well with me, and not only will I once again be falling behind on my computer formatting & restructuring (which has been starting to come together fairly nicely quite recently), but it will also place me back on the Island of Kaua'i, which I'd sworn never to return to after the bogus bullshit they pulled regarding their stink against the ''Superferry.'' But the tantalizing offer of at least 3 times more than what I am normally earning as an hourly wage, complimented with a full 40-hour work week (but with the traditional ''5-day work week,'' outdoors, rain or shine), I figured the extra earnings will serve me well, especially now that I am giving very serious consideration to effecting a permanent move from Hawaii altogether, with plans to either return to Lawrence, Kansas or giving a considerable amount of thought to some mountainous region in West Virginia. I was later told that the flight out would commence early Monday morning.

Since Thursday was a holiday I ran about town taking care of my latest expenses Friday afternoon, which would be my final opportunity to get caught up on this mountain of debt which I had procrastinated with for so long (I just barely got in to renew my motorcycle registration which was due at the end of the month, and in the confusion I think I may have paid the balance on the wrong phone/internet bill -- I still have not checked for certain yet). It was not until I'd gone back to work Saturday morning that I realized that I still had not submitted my income verification form for my lease renewal, and I will be very pressed for time to get it dropped off in the office and still make the flight out.

Was also given the last day of my regular schedule off (without having been informed, of course, and my replacement for the day having likewise not been informed), so that gave me a little extra time to get my personal items set aside as well as doing a little extra work on my video files and running around last minute on my bicycle (wearing no pants underneath my long black t-shirt which I use for around the apartment) to mail off ahead of time rent for next month (though the lease certification stuff is still pending) and to ATM deposit the four paychecks which had still been left lying around which I had picked up at the office the day I had intended to hand them my income verification request form (God, I miss when life was much simpler!). But then, whether I'll even have a job to go back to afterwards probably remains to be seen, because I think I got busted Saturday, sleeping in one of the classrooms I'm not supposed to be having access to.

I also made sure I let everybody know that I was going to be gone, including leaving messages (written and telephone machine subsequently) to the resident and property managers, a couple of email exchange friendlies, and my mother.

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* NOTE: At this point, I am ending this quarter's journal entries early and intend to pick up on next month's/quarter's page with the detailed layout of the off-island trip (similar to what was done in the  ''Summer 2007''  page -- I will try my best to keep it current, if I am able to access the Internet during that stay).

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* UPDATE NOTE - (November 30, 2007, 23:30 HST): Just arrived back to the apartment from Kaua'i less than half an hour ago, the job assignment off island went totally bust for me.

I had managed to keep the events of the experience relatively up-to-date at this point, according to the arrangement I had made with regard to ''jumping ahead'' a week early in beginning the new quarter for journal entries (i.e., not finishing out Autumn 2007 before beginning the entries for the ''winter'' season), and to date the entries are current.

But here's the dilemma: I NEVER intentionally tamper with the ''integrity'' of these journal ''archive'' pages once I've set things down for publication, with the only rare exceptions being when I've come across a ''formatting'' error badly in need of correction or to complete an entry which had inadvertantly been cut short, repeated or otherwise left incomplete or ''extra-complete.'' And with this early jump I've taken, I'm sort of up against a wall, since my stay on Kaua'i did NOT carry over into next month as expected, so ''technically'' speaking those entries SHOULD be repasted here in the ''Autumn 2007'' page to complete the season properly.

I think my only possible solution is to simply leave the entries posted in the ''winter'' quarter ''as is'' and simply repost those same entries here on this page as well, so as not to disrupt the process I've already put into motion.

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